Empathy

The heat came from within. No place to be named or specified, just from deep under the skin. It’s such an unsettling feeling, looking for a spot to be released, the first slip or breach that might be opened through the thick armor. But the guards are not let down, they’re tough enough to not let the feeling burst out.

Or so I assumed. Soon I learned the mistake I’d made. An armor had never been built, thick or thin. No guards were in duty. At all my life, I failed growing stronger; I had tricked myself into believing I learned from past experiences, that my errors were, somehow, worth.

Once the feeling tore my flesh, I saw my incapacity, even through the blurriness of the tear, I could see. The feeling came dressed as a tear, tearing my skin. First it dropped from one eye, soon followed by the other. They were cold, the heat had faded. I could feel the cool path they were drawing on my face. I stood still, focusing on the discomfort they caused. Headed to my chin, they met and fell on my lap at the same time, from the same place.

And now she cries too. I believe it’s sympathy… though I know it’s not. We all have our own problems and little can we do to assist the ones we cherish. Most people are unaware of others and what they are going through. My job is to notice. But most times I wish people noticed me too.